The law of attraction may not be the key when it comes to the psychology of choosing the best workout buddy.   Personality and temperament go a long way in finding a compatible exercise partner, but the traits can be very different from those you cherish in your romantic partner or best friend.

Rather than following your heart, use a common sense strategy. What works for you is as unique as your own personality, your personal likes and dislikes, your goals in an exercise program and your individual resources - such as your available time, money and space. To find a good match in a workout partner, look for someone who has similar orientation as you. What are your personal preferences? Do you prefer to work out in the morning or evening? Indoors or outdoors? At home or in a gym?

For some of the personality characteristics you might want to consider in picking a workout buddy, read my comments in Linda Wasmer Andrews blog "Minding the Body: The guide to health and happiness". 

Post: "Eight Traits of the Perfect Workout Partner:
Fitness experts share tips on finding the right exercise buddy"

My husband James and I just returned from month-long travels, including two weeks in Croatia.

We chose to be as active as possible - hiking in magnificent national parks, climbing up hundreds of steps in ancient walled cities, swimming in clear green waters, and hiking mountain trails.   At 66 years young, I was delighted to be fit enough to embrace all of these challenges without hesitation.

I was thrilled to be able to manage the rigors of travel – hiking the length of airports with luggage, sleeping in cramped berths on boats, sitting for hours in airplanes, trains and cars.  My low back and neck never complained, no matter how many different positions I subjected them to.  I was able to manage my luggage without creating any distress in my upper back and shoulders.  My stamina prevailed over jet-lag (with an occasional afternoon nap, of course!)

Only my calves protested this ambitious itinerary by cramping at night.  My legs were stiff in the morning, so I started every day by stretching in bed. My routine:  Point and flex feet; stretch hamstrings, glutes and inner thighs; do a spinal twist; finish with child's pose. And ready to go!

Several times during the trip, James and I asked each other how many more years we have to make a trip like this.  I say we have more than a few and I'm determined to maintain my present level of conditioning so that we can.  I came back with a renewed dedication to my personal fitness training program as "travel insurance" for the future.

On March 11 in this blog I introduced you to Elizabeth, who had begun to incorporate more movement into each day by making small changes, such as tip toeing around (to strengthen her calf muscles), stretching at the sink and walking up the steps at the office.  As she progressed, Elizabeth decided to engage her boss, Connie, in a health kick.

March 17, Walking Update from Elizabeth:
I've been walking regularly for 7 weeks along with my other activities, housecleaning, gardening etc. No weight loss to speak of… Haven't eaten any junk for weeks, light lunches (salad) and last week started making a concerted effort to slowly cut back alcohol use. Clothes are looser and I'm very strong and doctors' reports are good so I'll just have to be satisfied with that for a while longer.

March 25, Buddy System:
Connie and I are walking downtown at lunch for about a mile and a half.  I'm trying to walk 6 days now, with a goal of 8000 plus steps. Some days I don't make the 8000 but make up for it by taking a longer faster walk. Hard to believe I could barely make it up three long flights at the office a year ago!  And I did lose about 4 ½ lbs when I last weighed in.

May 5, Logging:
Connie and I are doing even better now since we have been using the free iphone app "Lose it" to log both food and exercise. Our "weigh in" day is Monday and I know I'll have weight loss to report. (I've lost 15 lbs since January, Connie about 10 lbs.) Connie is having a harder time with food than I am. I have been using your approach with her, that is, trying to focus more on her strength, stamina and fewer aches and pains rather than her weight loss. This seems to help her not get discouraged. She has a much longer way to go than I do, and changes show on my frame more quickly than on hers.

May 31, Long Term Goals:
I continue to keep Connie on track and focused on long term goals. She used to be able to drop weight easily in her 30's. Well that day is long gone... So I focus on the long term. A year ago I could never have said "let's go walk 2 miles fast".... She is more "food obsessed" than I am (mine is alcohol as you know). She is on track for 1 1/2 lbs a week-losing 10 lbs this month - with a goal of 50 lbs next April. I started much earlier so my weight loss is at least 23 lbs since Jan. (about 3 lbs a week), plus I can work in the yard or inside for hours and hours.

Take away tips:  Small, consistent changes deliver big benefits in terms of health and weight loss.  Use the Buddy System to reinforce positive lifestyle changes.  Be accountable:  keep track of your efforts in a log to make sure that you meet your goals.  Stay focused on the Big Picture – your health, strength and stamina – and long term goals.  Ask yourself:  What do you need to do now to be your best in 10 years?

Have you gotten a jump on your New Year's resolutions to shape up and get fit?  From my experience, it takes people about three weeks into January to realize they haven't actually taken any action despite their best intentions.  Now is the time to get started, and here is some free stuff to help you get on your way.

Running with Mascara Giveaway (ends 2/3/11) Enter here: Win a signed copy of Strength Training for Women

One of  Fit&Fab Living's sister sites is giving away a free copy of my book Strength Training for Women, which ties into the article I wrote for them--Strength Training: The Anti-Aging Workout! To enter the giveaway, simply leave a comment about your experience with strength training on the site (click on the link in the subheading above) by February 3.  The winner will be randomly chosen and announced on February 4.

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Interview with Dr. Alicia Stanton, host of "Aging without Limits" web talk radio show, 1/18/11

In my interview (listen here) with Dr. Stanton we focused on practical advice you can put to use today to get your new year off to the right start.  Listen in to discover 4 functional exercises you can start doing at home that can make all the difference in how your body ages.  The best thing is that you already have all the equipment you need – your own body!!

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Interview with Kim Pagano (listen here), AM 1400 KKZZ radio, 1/18/11

No, we're not related despite sharing the same last name, but definitely do relate to the mission to help people get fit.  In my interview with Kim, we explored the difference in the way men and women do strength training, and then I shared 5 strength training "Don'ts", including "Don't start off too fast or increase too soon because you'll risk muscle soreness and strain."  Next week I'll elaborate on all 5 "Don'ts" in this column.

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“A Session With JJ” – Episode 84, (listen here) – 01/14/11 | Voices On The Net
On January 14, I  joined host JJ for episode #84 of “A Session With JJ” in which we discussed how to keep in shape for a minimal investment of time and money.  We touched on what types of equipment you need to get started on a strength workout program at home, the importance of warming up before every workout, and the differences between weight machines and free-weights.

Do you know that strengthening your muscles boosts your energy levels and helps improve your balance?  Spending the last two weeks of August with my mother has made me more aware than ever of the importance of weight training. 

At more than 92 years of age, she has always been an active woman, motivated to exercise.  She loves it all – aerobic activities like the stationary bike or the seated stepper; working out with weights; yoga and stretching; balance training.

Following an injury a year and a half ago, Mom completed several rounds of physical therapy and then continued to do all the exercises on her own.  Her daily routine included a vigorous series of bodyweight exercises to strengthen her legs and flexibility exercises to keep range of motion in her hands and fingers, which are limited in function due to arthritis. 

I noticed, however, that her walking ability has suffered over the past couple of years and that one leg in particular has become considerably weaker.  When we rode the elevator from her eleventh floor apartment to the lobby of her building she had to perch on the stool since she doesn't have the stamina in her legs to stand for those few minutes.  Her equilibrium has also declined and she has serious balance issues.

I was delighted that she was amenable to going back into the weight room.  She's begun using the seated stepper again, and it was gratifying to see how easily she was able to adapt to the equipment based on the years of using it in the past.  Since it has levers for upper body involvement, it will help strengthen her arms, as well as her legs.  We made a plan for her to use it 2-3 times a week, to do her chair yoga class once a week and on the other days to continue with the bodyweight exercises she learned in physical therapy.

Studies have shown that the frail elderly – even those in their 80s and 90s - can improve their strength, stamina, stability, walking speed and balance in as little as eight weeks of strength training three times a week.  We are never too old to begin a strength training program, and the sooner we start, the longer we benefit.

I'll be spending the next two weeks in Cleveland with my mother, and I have great plans for both of us in terms of exercise.  My mother is 92 and I'm eager to work with her on upper body strength and flexibility.  As for me, I look forward to getting into a regular running routine.

We share breakfast at a table by a window with a panoramic view of the Cleveland Museum of Art and Lake Erie in the distance.  Sitting opposite each other, I'm able to take her through exercises for her arms and shoulders using light weights.  Upper body strength is so important in getting through the day with ease, and we've all had moments when we realize we could be doing better.  My mother mentioned recently that she wasn't able to organize her closet because she was having difficulty lifting some of the boxes in it.  She hasn't been doing her weights lately, so it's definitely time to get back on the program. 

Stretching is also important for my mother because she has become a little stooped with age and from relying on a walker for stability.  So after the weight training, we do a series of stretches that she loves.  It feels so good to sit up tall, stretch the sides of the torso and lift the chest, arching the upper back gently.  Then we do some specific stretches for the muscles of the arms and shoulders that we worked with weights.  By the time we're done, Mom is absolutely beaming.

For myself, I put on my running shoes and in less than five minutes I'm jogging around the lagoon in front of the art museum.  I do four laps, incorporating some stairs along the way.  Afterwards I do a full body stretch in the park outside my mother's building and in less than a half hour I'm done.  It's a great way to fit in a daily run, which is difficult in my normal work schedule. 

We both start the day feeling virtuous and smiling!

Enjoy the last of summer and I'll be back on the blog after Labor Day.